Sources of Resistance – Barriers to Cooperation
	- Negative emotions
	- Habit
	- Skepticism about reaching agreement: thinking that giving in is a loss
	- Perceived power: Seeing negotiation as win-lose process
	- Your reaction

Don’t react
	- Don’t strike back
	- Don’t give in
	- Don’t break off relationship
	- Go to “the balcony”
		o Keep your eyes on the prize – your interest
		o BATNA – Best alternative to a negotiated agreement – your Plan B – walk away 
		  alternative
			- Don’t settle for any agreement worst than BATNA
		o Recognize the opponent’s tactic – name the game
		o By time to think
			- Just pause and saying nothing
			- “Let me just make sure I understand exactly what you’re saying.”

Disarm your opponent
	- Surprise your opponent
		o Don’t pressure
		o Don’t resist
		o Listen intently to opponent
			- Paraphrase afterwards
		o Recognize opponent’s point
			- Apologize if warranted
				• “I’m sorry you’ve experienced this problem.  You’re one of my 
				  favorite customers, and you’re the last person I want to see 
				  unhappy.”
		o Agree wherever you can
			- Look for occasions where you can say yes to your opponent.
			- Say “Yes, and…” instead of “But….”
			
Change the game
	- Bargaining to finding common ground
	- Change your mindset
		o Not either/or – both/and
	- Reframe
		o You seem to feel really strongly about this.  I’d be interested in 
		  understanding why.
		o Help me see why this is so important to you.
		o Help me understand why….
		o Why not do it this way?
		o What if ….
		o What would you suggest I do?  What would you do if you were in my position?  
		  How would you suggest I proceed?
		o What would you say makes that fair?  
		o Pascal:  “People are usually more convinced by reason they discover by 
		  themselves than by those found by others.”
		o What’s the purpose of this policy?
		o Who has the authority to grant an exception?
	- After asking question, let the silence persist.
	- Stonewall responses
		o Ignore stonewall – pretend you didn’t hear it.
		o Interpret stonewall as an aspiration – “We all have aspirations…”
	- Responses to tricks
		o Play along with it – play dumb

Make it easy to say yes
	- Make outcome look like victory to opponent
	- Don’t pressure
	- Draw opponent into goal
	- Involve your opponent in the problem-solving exercise
		o Ask for opponent’s ideas
			- Offer a list of options
	- Help opponent save face

Make it hard to say no
	Do not threaten – warn:  bring your opponent to his senses, not to his knees.

Indirect action – go around the barrier